


It's Kind Of Fucked Up, The Way You Go Around Taking What You Want, Then Leaving

by orphan_account



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Angst, M/M, Sadness, denying feelings, liam being a confusing motherfucker, zayn pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-11-28
Updated: 2012-11-28
Packaged: 2017-11-19 17:45:15
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,318
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/575936
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Zayn just wants Liam to want him but Liam wants other people.</p>
            </blockquote>





	It's Kind Of Fucked Up, The Way You Go Around Taking What You Want, Then Leaving

**Author's Note:**

> i have long story titles im sorry

Zayn wonders sometimes what would happen if he slapped Liam right across his face and yelled,

"Hey notice me already!" But of course Liam doesn't notice. Liam is to busy studying, running track, being on the swim team and being a good guy. Liam doesn't notice Zayn who kind of just silently pines from a corner and reads Crush by Richard Siken, hoping, wanting for Liam to just freaking notice him! All Liam ever does though is smile and go, "You okay?" And Zayn wants to yell, scream and throw a fit because he's not okay! He's had a crush on Liam since the day Liam moved into the house next to Harry's and became a part of their crew in year 7.

Their crew really consisted of Zayn, Liam, Harry, Louis, and Niall. Harry and Louis were in a relationship and honestly had been in one since the first time they laid eyes on each other and Niall had several different flings.

Liam did have this whole serious relationship going on with Danielle, a dancer at their school for two years. It absolutely killed Zayn because Danielle wasn't unlikeable. She was pretty and always talked to the guys like they were her friends to which really they were. Zayn liked her because she made Liam happy but Zayn was selfish and he wanted to be the one to make Liam happy. Liam would smile at Danielle like the sun shone out of her ass and it would kill Zayn, forcing him to find solstice in bitter teen angst, love and loss and just himself.

But then, Liam came into Zayn's room one day all torn up and eyes red. "Danielle broke it off." He had said and Zayn should've been happy, should've done a little jig but Liam looked like he was about to have a seizure. So Zayn just hugged him, rubbed his back and whispered soothing words. None of this made him feel good, the way Liam looked like he could die any second and Zayn didn't want that for someone he was in love with. 

"What happened?" Zayn had managed to ask and Liam had looked so hopeless as his light brown eyes met Zayn's hazel ones, 

"I don't know. She said she couldn't do it anymore and I feel so silly you know but she was... I love her." Liam had said, it had broke everything Zayn had. Every ounce of emotion Zayn had for Liam because Liam loved Danielle like Zayn loved him and Zayn knew how it felt. Zayn said the only thing he could think of at that moment, 

"Wanna sleep over?" Liam had and even though Zayn knew he couldn't have Liam, he still had a part of him. That wasn't good enough but Zayn took it. 

Liam eventually got over Danielle and he even said hi to her in the hallway once, causing her to look startled. The boys of course made Liam get drunk and that was the night Zayn didn't and did want to remember. It started off as a harmless peck on the lips. They were both in Louis' room because Zayn didn't like loud places and Liam just really didn't want to be at a party right now. 

"Ever kissed a guy, Zayn?" Liam had asked because of course they knew Zayn's preference, he wouldn't keep that from his friends. Zayn was shocked, 

"Uh yeah." Zayn had said and Liam had smiled, reached over and pressed a chaste kiss to his lips. Zayn knew Liam wasn't drunk so Zayn just kind of stared, Liam was blushing but he still was smiling. 

"Now I have, too." Liam had said and Zayn had swallowed, nodded and just said, 

"Okay." Because what do you do, how do you react when someone you've been wanting for ages kisses you. Zayn decides to look back up and suddenly Liam's kissing again and this time, harder with more purpose and then he pulls away. He looks at Zayn and kind of smiles and Zayn's heart melts no matter how fucking cliche it is because Liam is giving him that look that means, "you okay?" All Zayn does is nod and their kissing again. 

They didn't have sex that night, just handjobs until they realize they didn't want to get caught by Louis. Liam had grabbed Zayn's hand, pulling him out of the bedroom. They totally ditched the party and they drove to Zayn's house, Liam parked in the driveway and marked Zayn with hickies. They would fade but what Zayn felt when he recieved them never would. 

"I guess you gotta go now." Liam had stated, pressing his forehead to Zayn's and Zayn had nodded, 

"Unless you want me to stay." Liam had pressed a kiss to his lips, 

"We have class." He had said and Zayn nodded, kissing Liam again and then getting out of the car. Liam had of course in his Liam way made sure Zayn got into his house safely. Zayn was so sure that everything had changed, that he had suddenly gotten what he wanted, what he had been dying over for years but then the next day everything was not okay. 

When Zayn saw Liam, he avoided him like the plague. He would blush and leave and it was ridiculous because neither of them were drunk so nobody had done this under the influence of alcohol. Zayn was hurt and didn't know what to say. Not even when Niall walked up to him and said, 

"Did you fuck Liam?" Because Niall knew and Niall was way to crude for his own good. 

~~ 

"We need to talk." Zayn had told Liam when he dragged him into a janitor's closet. Zayn wasn't a very bold person but this was not working for him because Liam had led him on, he couldn't just expect it all to go away. 

"I don't want to talk Zayn." Liam had said and Liam had shook his head, 

"Stop it Liam, just stop it." Zayn replied and Liam had swallowed, Zayn stared at his perfect neck thinking of the way he had marked Liam. Had marked what he had foolishly thought would be his. 

"What Zayn?" Liam had asked in that exasperated way he did. Zayn was in disbelief, 

"What do you mean what? Did what happen mean nothing to you?" Zayn sounded like a bloody girl but he didn't care, he needed Liam to reasure him that oh he was being ridiculous and Liam did want him. 

"Zayn... I was just having some fun." Liam said shyly, looking down at his feet. Zayn felt his heart drop because what had been fun for Liam had been something completely different for Zayn. Zayn shook his head because of course this would happen to him because he let Liam get away with anything and he was weak while Liam was strong, 

"Go fuck yourself Payne." He muttered and then he flung the door open, walking out. Leaving Liam in there and he didn't even get far because he kind of went into fetal position in the middle of the hallway. He didn't want to live anymore, not when Liam was to busy being perfect and Zayn was to busy being a screwed up mess.  

~~ 

A month later and Zayn still pines. He eventually told Liam he forgave him even though he didn't, he wasn't sure if he ever would. Now he watched Liam watch the new guy in his swim team and that killed Zayn more than when Liam was with Danielle. Because that meant Liam wasn't ashamed of being with a guy because he blatanly talked about his crush on Kevin but he was ashamed of being with Zayn. 

Zayn would try to catch his eye, try to find something to show that maybe he had a chance but when he looked into Liam's face he's not sure he ever did. 


End file.
